Because it came up in conversation on a recent visit, I mentioned to landlord Steve Anstey that I write up pubs for The Yorkshire Post. “Well don’t be putting us in there,” he says. “We don’t need any more people turning up.”

Pub of the Week: Cross Keys, Thixendale
Drinks selection80%
80%Overall Score
Reader Rating: (2 Votes)

It’s a bold and unusual attitude for a landlord, but it is certainly true that the tiny Cross Keys in the delightful village of Thixendale doesn’t need more trade. Steve and his wife Mary have been running the pub for 30 years now and they get enough walkers, cyclists and regulars through the door to keep them plenty busy. The last thing they need is you lot turning up and littering the place with your unwanted money. I promised them I wouldn’t encourage you, and I won’t.
So don’t go to the Cross Keys. Don’t find a corner in the cosy L-shaped bar and enjoy a pint of award-winning local real ale. Don’t order one of the generously-portioned options off the traditional-but-imaginative menu.
Don’t take your kids to sun themselves in the beer garden and don’t hire one of the rooms because you wouldn’t want to wake up and walk out straight into the heart of the Wolds. And don’t even think of engaging Steve in conversation, all you’ll get is a mix of Yorkshire bonhomie, gentle ribbing and blunt opinion. And who wants that from a pub landlord?
For all of these and many other good reasons, please don’t go to the Cross Keys in Thixendale. Consider yourselves told – stay away! (I think that should keep them from showing up, Steve.)
The Cross Keys, Thixendale, Malton, North Yorkshire YO17 9TG. 01377 288272.

About The Author

Dave Lee is TV producer and film-maker who also writes on food & drink, travel and culture for various publications. He is a regular contributor on BBC Radio 4 and the Yorkshire Post. Worryingly, he believes that the finest food on earth is the pattie butty.

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